Nobody gets anywhere without the help of so many other people along the way. Most of our successes and failures are not totally (or even at all?) our fault.
The real ones recognize this, and they look out for others so they can hopefully help to pay that kind of good fortune forward.
A long time ago, someone took me under their wing, as someone had done for them before, and so on. The initial mentorship I got as a young seller opened my eyes to new possibilities and fundamentally changed my worldview.
It wasn't long after that when I realized I wanted to pay it forward as well. Initially I thought I might teach at a university or something. Now 11 years in, I'm still pinching myself that I get to do what I do for a living.
But it wasn’t just one person, and it didn’t end when I reached a certain age. It’s still everywhere I look.
Several years ago, someone who has had what I call a profound influence on me as a speaker/consultant passed me a referral. He was unavailable for the date, and the budget was well below his fee schedule. He sent me a message and asked if I might be interested. It resulted in me picking up a great client, who ended up engaging me more than once over the next couple of years.
After I closed the deal, I sent him a package with some locally roasted coffee (from another client of mine) and a small check as a referral fee. A couple of weeks later, he sent me a text with a video of him tearing it up. The message said something to the effect of:
“That’s not why I sent the referral. I’m blessed to be in the position to pass that business along, and I didn’t get here on my own. I refuse to cash this check. You will be in this position in the future, and you need to promise that you’ll tear up checks like this too.”
Early this week, I recorded with Paul Fuller for The Art & Science of Complex Sales podcast (it’ll be out in a couple of weeks). One of the things we talked about was finding and surrounding yourself with people who root for you and want to see you succeed. That thought has stuck with me since.
A couple of days later, I flew to St. Louis and got to spend some time with Mike Weinberg. We played golf, talked business, and told stories. We laughed (and sweat) a lot. On the last hole, I managed to hole out a tricky shot from a bunker for birdie. Mike called started shouting while the ball was still in the air, and got airborne when it dropped in the hole. He may have been more excited than I was.
He and his wife were so gracious, including inviting me back to his house for a few hours when my flight was delayed by almost four hours. Despite the fact that this house is totally under construction, he wasn’t going to allow me to spend all that time at the airport. When he dropped me off, he thanked me:
“I know you wanted to come out here and talk shop, because I know you’ve been working on something and I’m happy to help. But this meant a lot to me too, and I’m really glad we did this.”
It’s really easy to forget this simple concept, but helping people feels good. When you realize that so many people helped you along the way, it feels even better to do that for someone else. The idea that I get to lead every day with gratitude is so fundamentally opposite of what I once thought selling was all about. Ironically, its exactly what keeps the flywheel turning.
I'm going to challenge you this Labor Day weekend to do two things.
Thank somebody who turned around and reached back to help you along the way. You don’t owe them, but both of you will feel good about it.
Reach out to someone else, maybe who's a little less tenured than you, and pay them a compliment. That little bit of recognition and encouragement goes a long way…
The Shoutout
It's been about a decade since Liz Wendling and I connected, and the energy came right through the phone from day one.
Few people are as passionate about helping salespeople feel less sleazy about the work we do. Human connection, problem solving, a genuine desire to help — that's what she teaches and that's what she lives.
Anytime I hear a rep say "I'd love to..." I hear her voice: "Of course you would. Make it about them.!"
That kind of passion doesn't extinguish. Grateful she still picks up when I call.
Hoping my North American readers enjoy this long weekend. It’s one of my favorites on the calendar. I’ll see you again next week.
Cheers,
JB
P.S. I signed a client this week to start a private podcast to help them better understand why they win, and another for a sales kickoff this fall. If either of those projects sound interesting to you, maybe we should talk.
